HOLDING ON......

I don't want to lie here alone
I don't want to fall asleep without you by my side



I don't want to be numb
I don't want tears rolling down my cheek
I don't want us to fall apart forever
Come back, am still here

Waiting for you
Waiting for your touch
Waiting for your love

Holding on to our love

Holding on to the time we spent
Like free birds doing things which were lame <3

I can't let go off our love we lived for once
I want to see the sunrise and the sunset once again with you by my side
Am holding on to those moments till my last breath
Turn around am still here

Waiting for you
Waiting for your touch
Waiting for your love

Holding on to our love.....

A ZILLION TIMES

I have seen you a zillion times
And every time I see you
I fall in love with you all over again
My heart starts to race
My frown turns into a smile
And all my worries are now in my past

You give the sweetest hug
Your sense of humor is like no other
The ability you have to make me smile
Is all you need to love me

Your laugh is so sweet
Your hug gives me warmth
You, yourself relive me from all pain 
The way you comfort me is just amazing


Every time we say good-bye
I start to cry
I say I LOVE U too many times
I said I LOVE U a zillion times.

Unknowingly

WE MET COINCIDENTALLY
AS DAYS PASSED WE TURNED TO BE GOOD FRIENDS


THE BOND SUDDENLY SEEMED TO BE SO STRONG
I USED TO FEEL SO SAFE IN THERE 
BY A VIRTUAL THOUGHT OF YOUR EXISTENCE


THOUGH YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN THERE FOR ME
ALWAYS TOLERATED MY TALKS DAYS AND NIGHTS


BUT I HAVE ALWAYS HATED IT
THAT YOU USED TO BOOZE AND TEXT ME :(
ANYWAY YOU HAVE BEEN A GREAT FRIEND


WHEN YOU SAID YOU MISSED ME 
AND I SAID I DON'T
THE REASON FOR ME  NOT MISSING YOU
WAS BECAUSE SOMEWHERE DOWN THE LINE

BIRD on the fence

                                                                There's a bird
                                                                outside of my window,
                                                                sitting on the fence
                                                                as if waiting
                                                                for someone,
                                                                or something
                                                                to come,
                                                                to happen.

                                                                He turns his head
                                                                curiously towards me,
                                                                and i smile
                                                                as if he
                                                                understands.

                                                                For a short time,
                                                                we share a moment
                                                                share a certain sadness
                                                                in our waiting
                                                                for someone,
                                                                or something
                                                                to come,
                                                                to happen

                                                                He looks around,
                                                                head jerking
                                                                to and fro,
                                                                as if trying to decide
                                                                which direction,
                                                                which wind
                                                                to carry himself on,
                                                                to float carelessly on

                                                                I would've offered a suggestion,
                                                                but I think
                                                                he made up his mind
                                                                on his own,
                                                                and disappeared from the fence
                                                                in a blur of dark feathers,
                                                                and silently
                                                                I wished him luck
                                                                in finding
                                                               what he was waiting for
                                                               what he was looking for.

AS DAYS PASS BY I LEARN......

To always dream However it may never come true But that's the best way To live life through To dream so high Never give up and always try Never let go or say goodbye That when there is darkness For sure dawn is the next And when everything is so tiring For sure there would be time to rest   To always care for a friend Always be true and never pretend Always love with no end And the broken hearts try to mend Never to feel the hate Always be confident and never hesitate Always believe in fate That lovers meet & stay together And others are apart So if you are one who have been left behind Don't cry and suffer Just search for a new start The past I must forget And nothing needs my regret To open my heart and forgive Cause that will help me to survive and live   To always offer my helping hand And never doubt in people when there is no proof And always try to understand Not to be shy If I have done something wrong But to admit it and be proud that I have learned A lesson that will help me to be strong

From the Beginning till the End....

It started out a simple hello, and ended with a single goodbye, the painful memories of that day, still makes me cry. When I look back at when we first met, how we were the stalkers, it started out as a simple game, but stronger it became. when i look back at when we first held hands, I remember how you looked, you were as red as a rose, and both your hands shook. when I look back at when we first said I love you, I had believed it was true, I had given my everything, all to you. When I look back at when we first kissed, I knew this was bliss, a joy I had recieved that would be endless, but I was wrong for this. When I look back at when we first said goodbye, it wasn't a word we'd repeat, it was the final word we'd say forever, the last time we'd meet.

HOMESICK

When it all started it was so fun...it was may be because it was novelty for me but I was happy then now suddenly things seem to be different, the bluish green wallpaper bores me now the tube light seems to be dim now, not as bright as it used to then.
Friendly companions in which I once found comfort, now lay at the foot of my bed with dark, hollow eyes.
The seconds gradually stopped ticking by on the clock by my bed and it scares me sometimes.
It was my only solid evidence that life was still going by, now I'm not so sure.
Meaningless chatter from outside my window keeping me in tune with reality, yet out of tune from myself.
The walls are starting to close in on me 
So I think I'm going to go
Because I'm all alone in this room…..i want to come home running, want to hug u Momma…..Baba..and want to fight with u Dadu...the sudden change is actually the eagerness to come back HOME...i am melancholy at being away from home and family now than then!!!

HeR FiRst EvEr!!!!!!

              Journey of 10yr gal, when she started understanding the difference between sexes and that 2 opposite sex attract (with normal limbic system)! She was in 3rd grade when she first found out, yeah she is normal and she finds a boy attractive! Being a true Libran she always went for looks first then the inner person. Actually that liking for the guy was for few days, he was in her elder bro's grade! As she grew up she had many small crushes on passer-by’s,as she was matured she understood there should be a limit to it... But though she had liking for a guy, she couldn’t drag it further as she was a big time coward ,though she has changed now! In her 7th grade with the company of her sweet, sexy the most complicated gal she has met her life,ADITI !!! They used to visit the D-mart medical store just to look at the handsome guy working there...  Coincidentally once her momma asked her to get a medicine, she went there along with Aditi and the same guy showed up... With her heart pumping twice the normal rate, her mixed feeling, she asked him for the medicine... both idiots used to find that guy handsome!!! He brought the medicine, and he said "hey u have a cute smile, I’m Raj ,engineering student, will you be my friend"...the pace at which she ran out of the D-mart store was what those idiots still laugh at!! That was the last day they ever saw him in d-mart...it was all puzzled...they didn’t ever see him again, don’t know why he left his job...may be it was his part time job in summer vacation ...they just kept guessing!!!                                                                                                      

             The most interesting guy in her 18 yrs. is RAHUL!! Dark,tall,kind-of handsome … the heart rob of the school and the one who lived in their complex! She used to see him studying in his bedroom,from the garden area. She was introduced to him by her cousin who was his classmate unfortunately or you can even say luckily!! :p She is still clueless as to what attracted her towards him!!! He was what she always wanted she thought then!! They used to study in the same school and used to be in the same school bus ,he was just one yr. senior to her!! Once while going back from school in bus no.23...he was given stare (the STD game) and she was the girl he had to stare at...she was demanded by the him "hey, remove your kal ho na ho specs for few secs"she did'nt listen to him at 1st, so he removed her glasses off her nose.....and that was her first 3min long stare she has had yet!! <3 Later putting on his school bag on his left shoulder he said," you are saurabh’s cousin, Right?? don’t mind...I'm sorry for the stare! Bdw what is your name?..She replied "Sara"...and with his hands he placed her specs on her nose! As years passed her love for him grew deeper and deeper! Sara used to tell the stuffs that she used to admire in him to none other than ADITI!! Guess what, because of her Aditi started liking Sara's first ever CRUSH. It was a love triangle formed in their colony! Two best friends with same crush!! Aditi being very beautiful... when Rahul came to know about her feelings. He asked her to be his friend! Sara broke!! But Aditi stopped liking him the very next day!! And on the other hand entire secondary section students teased Rahul with Sara's name and vice versa...neway that were immature stuffs which had acted as the spice in the entire tiring school hours! The first bad word sara ever learned was also due to Rahul! She had asked his friend whether he liked Aditi or no through a note?? When he heard about this he walked up to her in the lunch-break and he tore the paper into pieces on which she questioned, and threw them on her face and said FUCK OFF... that moment she shed her 1st teardrops being a guy as the reason! She was very sad that day, first thing she did as she reached home was opened the dictionary without removing her shoe buckles and finding the meaning of fuck off...it means either get lost or make love! Sara was shattered!! Neway she never wanted to see his face again!! But when he heard that she cried, the very next day he again came up to her and this time it was the word among 3 golden words! "SORRY...for BEING SO RUDE... I Was PISSD OFF...neway Tc bye"...and the bell rang...and as expected...Sara was back into him!!! This incident happened in her 8th grade. Calender's pages turned over with her studies! But as she can’t have a simple but always complicated life! On Saturday,her mommu was home, she asked her to check her drawers if she had any of her imp stuffs in there!! She did check it before going to school but didn’t find any!! On Returning from school within 4 hrs, being half day. Her mommu opened the door she was holding the Ganesh’s book (holy) reading the stotra and simultaneously tears rolling down her cheeks! It sounded fishy, and Sara didn’t guess it wrong!! Her mom got to know about her first ever crush Rahul ...anyway it was over, after her explanation on 'why not to have crushes'...it’s DISTRACTION...it’s BAD...NOT GOOD AND STUDIOUS GIRLS JOB! After this Sara was closer, rather open about her secrets in life with her mommu, may be it was because, it was only the two of them under one shelter,her Brother being in IIT hostel and her father transferred to next state!! Well later on in her tenth grade...she was over him well it was for time being, but still 10th taught her to get over her 4ys long immature crush!!! It also made her realize that there is a difference between a crush and actual love!!                                                         

             Finally crushes are part and parcel of every normal limbic system of human,and that of those growing up innocent ages and not what parents call them, as empty-minded children ka kaam!! Well those immature ages were so fun!! And now it has been lost somewhere...now there should be sense in every action!! Even I miss my stupidity,and those early teenage years,it was fun!!!                            

             When an early teenage girl realizes her first ever crush on someone it is a very innocent feeling....she starts thinking that this is the guy!!...people say love at first sight.. and she starts relating her crush-story to every other ekta kapoor or twight love story..but somewhere down this stupidity...every girl experiences sumthg or the other!!! and when she is over her teenage years..when she looks back, remembering her first ever crush...she surely laughs..at her stupidity,kiddish mentality,innocence!!!... Finally CRUSHES bring a sweet smile on her face when she looks back!!!